Grief and the Holidays By Tiffany Kasper, LCSW

The holidays can be a difficult time for anyone who has ever experienced the death of a loved one. That first year in particular can especially be challenging to navigate as we watch others celebrate and learn how to develop new holiday rituals and traditions. Whether you change everything, or nothing, you have experienced loss and it will take time to heal.

Tips for Coping with Grief at the Holidays:

- Remember that you have the right to do things differently. You can make changes or observe the holiday in the usual way. Next year, you can change things back or do things yet another way. There is no right or wrong way.

- Allow yourself to feel a range of emotions. The holidays may spark a wide range of emotions, such as happiness, anger, and sadness. Allow yourself to feel your emotions without judging yourself. Your feelings aren’t right or wrong, they just simply are.

- Honor your memories. Create a memory box, light a candle in memory of your loved one, or include one of their favorite dishes in your holiday meal. Creating an honoring tradition can bring comfort during the holidays.

- Reach out to others when you need to talk about your feelings related to the loss. It can be good to connect with others, especially those who understand what you’re going through. It may also help to talk with a therapist or attend a grief support group.

- Take extra special good care during the tough times. Self-care is important, especially during the holidays or times of high stress. Avoid using alcohol or over-eating to self-medicate and instead turn to healthy self-care strategies, such as spending time in nature, journaling, or doing things that make you laugh. Keep up with self-care, even when you’re feeling good.